Your Expectations May be Ruining your Life

February 17, 2015 by Denuelle Meyer - 5 Comments

horse-with-blindersEnjoy this guest post from a wonderful new friend of mine, Laurie Seymour. Laurie knows the deepest answers in life are revealed when you are quiet enough to connect with your inner resources. Be sure to check out her website The Baca Journey.

One definition of the word expectation is: “a mental image of something expected, often compared to reality.” Whenever our thoughts revolve around a belief that something or someone should exist in a particular way, we have removed ourselves from the creative possibilities inherent in being open to explore.  We are unable to see what actually is, so we cannot have clarity.  

“Here is what’s going to happen. This is how life is. I won’t disagree with you because I don’t want to be alone. You should be more like me.  Why are you doing it THAT way?”

A world of possibility lives on the other side of expectations.

Another definition of expectation is:  “a standard of conduct or performance expected by or of someone.”  Do you really want to waste your life in meeting someone else’s standards? Are you limiting your expression by measuring your inner fire against the “expected performance”?  You cannot know the truth of any situation if you are caught in the way you’ve been told that things should be. You cannot you see the essence of someone else when you’re wearing expectation blinders.

Expectations and control are bound together; they are symbiotic co-breeders. Our expectations show up when we want those around us to act in ways that we believe are best. We get trapped by the desire to control what happens to us, which sometimes looks like letting someone else be in charge.  Do you have a hidden agreement to maintain the status quo at all costs?  Do your expectations rule the show?

A world of possibility lives on the other side of expectations.

At the heart of most any quarrel lies an expectation.  Expectation blocks communication; you cannot hear, see, or feel the true essence.  In my own marriage, the desire for truth has to be strong enough to take us past defining what is right or wrong. We are committed to get to the place where our bodies can relax and soften.  Our intention is to have conversations that matter, where we are not on opposite sides of a battlefield. We want the best for ourselves. We want fullness for each other. Our willingness to get to the heart means we have to forego being right. I cannot impose my way of being on him.  He cannot weigh and measure “rightness.”

When you step aside from expectations, you open the door to the vastness of the possible.  To step through to the other side takes courage to look beyond what you already know.  Walk the path.  Take the inner journey.  Spend time being quiet so that the still small voice within you can become strong. Build a connection with yourself that brings you the freedom to be who you are.

A world of possibility lives on the other side of expectations.

 

If you liked this article and want to find more on the Inner Journey, check out Laurie’s website, The Baca Journey. Get your copy of her free eBook, 7 Awareness-Provoking Experiences!

headshot-2-300x397Laurie Seymour, M.A., knows the deepest answers in life are revealed when you are quiet enough to connect with your inner resources. She moved from psychotherapist and professor to speaker, writer and teacher of classes that help people uncover this potent connection. She is the creator/founder of The Baca Journey, inspiration for those who want to know more about how life works. The Baca Journey speaks to the part of you that yearns to know more: the powerful part connected to your Inner Teacher and the greater truth. Laurie is author of the weekly “Friday Focus,” designed to swing open the doors of your creativity, your perception and your inner connection.